work ytd
wid auntie
surprisingly can get along wid her
e firx time since dec
lols
if onli we can remain this way
how great
she's not tat scary afterall
submitted moi schedule
for e last mth of work
hmm
so fast
met jing n kel ytd
n tat blur sotong
he got pestered by tat lil gal again
haas
wonders tat lil gal got bomb him today anot
working later
hmm
gotta go home moiself
sotong not going to sit wif mi in e train
he today half day onli
cant expect him to wait until 10
how great if can go home wid him
everytime i finish work
hee
gosh
im falling in
again
his daddy saw mi
caught mi in surprise
dunno how to react
was trying to hide away
stil he spotted mi
den saw his didi
den daddy told mummy
mummy ask where am i
omg
all in one day
den went to meet ys
he sang e song again
n e last sentence he look at mi
n sang it to mi
tao yan
make ppl blush
humph
honestly
picture still as blur
a little sweet a little confusing
haven been sleeping well
nightmares
scared
but he was neber told
hurr
silly gal
dun dare to ask for much
cherish
e onli word in her mind n heart
thinking of organising bbq
before i leave
not sure if he will still be dere
when i come back
call it a last dinner
wadsoeva
though i dun wish to
let it be sweet
memories behold
yet dunno if he will be in singapore
so many ctries he's going to
pls be back in time
let mi c u
before i dun get to
he asked mi to go jb wid him
n his mummy
heehee
but both gotta work
den he say after his attachment
yippee
looking forward
wish mi well
signing off*
Sunday, June 04, 2006
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
oh no.
im sick. real sick.
finali went to the doctor ytd.
indigestion.
went back again today.
medication stronger.
so many things canot eat.
the beans series.
cauliflower. brocolli.
moi fav milk.
fried food.
dumplings.
gosh. its the rice dumpling festival.
but i reali learnt the lesson.
was such a torture after the dumpling.
had a hard time getting to sleep.
couldnt even go school today.
when today is such an impt day.
test papers.
IAF tutorial.
results for sm test.
let's pray i dun need to go for retest.
=_=
im sick. real sick.
finali went to the doctor ytd.
indigestion.
went back again today.
medication stronger.
so many things canot eat.
the beans series.
cauliflower. brocolli.
moi fav milk.
fried food.
dumplings.
gosh. its the rice dumpling festival.
but i reali learnt the lesson.
was such a torture after the dumpling.
had a hard time getting to sleep.
couldnt even go school today.
when today is such an impt day.
test papers.
IAF tutorial.
results for sm test.
let's pray i dun need to go for retest.
=_=
Sunday, May 28, 2006
went yvonne's bday tat day
was shocked when i reached
its not a house unit
its at coffeeshop
so many ppl
like wedding dinner
esp when she n bf take photos
envy em
how i wish i can behave like em
it used to be
haix
had a nice time wid em
moi sec sch mates
some bery long neber c liao
yihn shin stil e same
e joker of e day
e big eater
haha
den went kbox
his singing improved
keep it up
mine is going downhill
where's moi shifu??
*shake head*
songs tat he sang
belongs to their memories
he denied
but i noe
y wud one be so pissed off
if u dun haf feelings??
jing told mi sth
dunno wad to sae
keep saying "i dunno"
she said
"in fact, dere's onli two words in ur heart
-waiting"
am i??
when friends ask
haf a bf?
she replied no
n dey all knew
e somebody once so impt
still lives in her heart
ytd went longtian's anni
saw e lilies on the zhuang
gosh
moi favourites
so nice
e next thing dat came into moi mind
i wan e lilies on moi wedding
e decorations
oops
reminds mi of the 9lilies
e 090909
e date. e promise.
haas
is she still waiting??
she onli noes
she tried to put it down
but somehow
she never had e courage to accept new
somehow her hands can onli slipped into tat somebody's
somehow she's onli able to find a sense of security in him
nvm if deres part 2 to his stories
e trust never once faded
never
wad abt the feelings?
its rekindling
like e candle n its flame
wad does tat mean??
was shocked when i reached
its not a house unit
its at coffeeshop
so many ppl
like wedding dinner
esp when she n bf take photos
envy em
how i wish i can behave like em
it used to be
haix
had a nice time wid em
moi sec sch mates
some bery long neber c liao
yihn shin stil e same
e joker of e day
e big eater
haha
den went kbox
his singing improved
keep it up
mine is going downhill
where's moi shifu??
*shake head*
songs tat he sang
belongs to their memories
he denied
but i noe
y wud one be so pissed off
if u dun haf feelings??
jing told mi sth
dunno wad to sae
keep saying "i dunno"
she said
"in fact, dere's onli two words in ur heart
-waiting"
am i??
when friends ask
haf a bf?
she replied no
n dey all knew
e somebody once so impt
still lives in her heart
ytd went longtian's anni
saw e lilies on the zhuang
gosh
moi favourites
so nice
e next thing dat came into moi mind
i wan e lilies on moi wedding
e decorations
oops
reminds mi of the 9lilies
e 090909
e date. e promise.
haas
is she still waiting??
she onli noes
she tried to put it down
but somehow
she never had e courage to accept new
somehow her hands can onli slipped into tat somebody's
somehow she's onli able to find a sense of security in him
nvm if deres part 2 to his stories
e trust never once faded
never
wad abt the feelings?
its rekindling
like e candle n its flame
wad does tat mean??
Thursday, May 25, 2006
omg!! moi soul has left mi!!
i was actuali thinking of wad to pack into moi luggage last nite.
this morning, im alrdy thinking
of how i wud look like when i come back.
tats like dunno how many mths later de things wor.
gosh.
actuali quite fast la.
now is alrdy end of may.
will be end of aug soon.
im having a test later!
test!! 15%!!
wad am i doing here?!!
aiyoyo..
actuali i do wonder.
how wud things be like when im not ard.
n when i come back.
wud things still be e same for mi??
the story. the people. e place.
e smell. e taste. e sounds.
would everything still be familiar??
would moi lollipop still be dere for mi??
or replaced??
would granny be forgotten??
would bb be forgotten??
stop!!!
i need to go back to moi books.
or shd i sae notes.
aiyo. its memorizing work again.
brain teaser.
jiayou jiayou jiayou!!
i cant wait to get moi pay.
i wan to get moi dream camera.
i wan to go shopping.
its gss!!
sales!!
not time for tests.
oh no. i need some motivation.
motivation!!!
i still wan moi 'a's at the end of the day.
i was actuali thinking of wad to pack into moi luggage last nite.
this morning, im alrdy thinking
of how i wud look like when i come back.
tats like dunno how many mths later de things wor.
gosh.
actuali quite fast la.
now is alrdy end of may.
will be end of aug soon.
im having a test later!
test!! 15%!!
wad am i doing here?!!
aiyoyo..
actuali i do wonder.
how wud things be like when im not ard.
n when i come back.
wud things still be e same for mi??
the story. the people. e place.
e smell. e taste. e sounds.
would everything still be familiar??
would moi lollipop still be dere for mi??
or replaced??
would granny be forgotten??
would bb be forgotten??
stop!!!
i need to go back to moi books.
or shd i sae notes.
aiyo. its memorizing work again.
brain teaser.
jiayou jiayou jiayou!!
i cant wait to get moi pay.
i wan to get moi dream camera.
i wan to go shopping.
its gss!!
sales!!
not time for tests.
oh no. i need some motivation.
motivation!!!
i still wan moi 'a's at the end of the day.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
hmm. guess im feeling better le.
at least not so xin ku le.
hopefulli not on-off.
been suffering for the past few wks le.
yesh! i can survive w/o e doctor!!
whahaha!!
but appetite still not bery good.
nvm. slowly will recover de.
oh no. im craving for thai food.
the sourness and spicy-ness.
awww.
went movies today.
over the hedge.
nice cartoon.
all abt food.
nono. tok abt family ties too.
dey r jux cute.
i wan e softtoys!!
oops.
guess im still a child at heart.
haas.
tat day cw asked.
when r we gg out?
haven get u ur present.
haas.
tot dey forget le.
hmm. put some money into an ang bao.
dat will be perfect.
honestly.
i reali dunno wad to buy.
heels maybe.
mine is wearing out.
dennis asked mi abt my present too.
dey wanted to get mi e giordano jeans.
tot i like it alot.
in actual fact. not reali.
tats y im hesitating.
sunday ish nadia's wedding.
yeah. can wear pretty clothes le.
but i need pretty shoes to go along.
hmm.
been living simply.
din quite bother abt wads going on.
jux simple simple de.
no happy or unhappy.
e good thing is.
no quarrels. no fighting.
dunno how long will this last.
onli noe to cherish.
n not to take it for granted.
opportunity dun come knocking twice.
dun let history repeat itself.
even if its jux a dream.
i wan to sae.
thankew.
at least not so xin ku le.
hopefulli not on-off.
been suffering for the past few wks le.
yesh! i can survive w/o e doctor!!
whahaha!!
but appetite still not bery good.
nvm. slowly will recover de.
oh no. im craving for thai food.
the sourness and spicy-ness.
awww.
went movies today.
over the hedge.
nice cartoon.
all abt food.
nono. tok abt family ties too.
dey r jux cute.
i wan e softtoys!!
oops.
guess im still a child at heart.
haas.
tat day cw asked.
when r we gg out?
haven get u ur present.
haas.
tot dey forget le.
hmm. put some money into an ang bao.
dat will be perfect.
honestly.
i reali dunno wad to buy.
heels maybe.
mine is wearing out.
dennis asked mi abt my present too.
dey wanted to get mi e giordano jeans.
tot i like it alot.
in actual fact. not reali.
tats y im hesitating.
sunday ish nadia's wedding.
yeah. can wear pretty clothes le.
but i need pretty shoes to go along.
hmm.
been living simply.
din quite bother abt wads going on.
jux simple simple de.
no happy or unhappy.
e good thing is.
no quarrels. no fighting.
dunno how long will this last.
onli noe to cherish.
n not to take it for granted.
opportunity dun come knocking twice.
dun let history repeat itself.
even if its jux a dream.
i wan to sae.
thankew.
gosh. im feeling so sick.
stomach upset.
been a couple of wks.
or had it been a month?
cant eat well. cant slp well.
no appetite.
forced moiself to eat.
eat liao feel like vomiting.
wth.
kneecap pain again.
dunno wth ish happening to mi.
mama went to c em training.
come back tel mi so many things abt USA.
samantha went b4.
sae bery cold.
need to bring medication.
need to wear thick clothings.
cannot bring too much money.
blah blah blah.
mummy. im not feeling well.
pls leave mi alone.
stop sending waves to moi ears.
im giddy. low blood pressure?
dunno.
im jux. not feeling well.
stomach upset.
been a couple of wks.
or had it been a month?
cant eat well. cant slp well.
no appetite.
forced moiself to eat.
eat liao feel like vomiting.
wth.
kneecap pain again.
dunno wth ish happening to mi.
mama went to c em training.
come back tel mi so many things abt USA.
samantha went b4.
sae bery cold.
need to bring medication.
need to wear thick clothings.
cannot bring too much money.
blah blah blah.
mummy. im not feeling well.
pls leave mi alone.
stop sending waves to moi ears.
im giddy. low blood pressure?
dunno.
im jux. not feeling well.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
misunderstanding cleared!!
yippee yuppie!!
heehee..
hmm. so now i noe.
sumtimes its good to clear the air.
n assumptions r reali not good.
cux its not owaes correct!
rather, it will lead to misunderstanding.
den unhappiness.
haas.
oh. n to moi dear wq.
pls do not start introducing guys to mi.
i dun need em.
neither do i wan any.
i alrdy haf one living in moi heart.
even not, i stil haf e love n warmth from moi family n friends.
so pls, pls. do not start ur matchmaking.
thankew bery much.
oh. n to wb.
haha. thanx alot for ur angbao.
its one of the best present i got.
its owaes better to gif mi money
den to buy mi things tat i reali haf no idea wad to do wid it.
moi room is in such a mess now.
all the presents in e big big plastic bag.
i din even haf time.
no. i shd say i dun even haf any more space to keep em.
i still think money is more practical.
im not money-minded.
bleah.
kk. gotta go back to moi books.
got a test later.
n i had a bad dream.
dreamt of moi p6 chinese teacher.
he was so agitated.
cux i din do well for the test.
wonder how he is now.
so long neber c him.
oh yes. i dunno y.
seems like chinese teachers dote on mi alot.
n dey do haf high expectations on mi.
not onli in chinese.
so i better do well.
its alrdy the last yr in poly.
probably moi last yr of education.
u better gif ur best, wanping.
jiayou!!
yippee yuppie!!
heehee..
hmm. so now i noe.
sumtimes its good to clear the air.
n assumptions r reali not good.
cux its not owaes correct!
rather, it will lead to misunderstanding.
den unhappiness.
haas.
oh. n to moi dear wq.
pls do not start introducing guys to mi.
i dun need em.
neither do i wan any.
i alrdy haf one living in moi heart.
even not, i stil haf e love n warmth from moi family n friends.
so pls, pls. do not start ur matchmaking.
thankew bery much.
oh. n to wb.
haha. thanx alot for ur angbao.
its one of the best present i got.
its owaes better to gif mi money
den to buy mi things tat i reali haf no idea wad to do wid it.
moi room is in such a mess now.
all the presents in e big big plastic bag.
i din even haf time.
no. i shd say i dun even haf any more space to keep em.
i still think money is more practical.
im not money-minded.
bleah.
kk. gotta go back to moi books.
got a test later.
n i had a bad dream.
dreamt of moi p6 chinese teacher.
he was so agitated.
cux i din do well for the test.
wonder how he is now.
so long neber c him.
oh yes. i dunno y.
seems like chinese teachers dote on mi alot.
n dey do haf high expectations on mi.
not onli in chinese.
so i better do well.
its alrdy the last yr in poly.
probably moi last yr of education.
u better gif ur best, wanping.
jiayou!!
Sunday, May 21, 2006
tired.
reali tired.
tmr will be wk 6 of school.
one more wk n it will be holidays.
endure.
one more month.
going to quit moi job.
endure.
jux want to slack ard doing nutink.
get somebody to dote on mi.
let mi feel e sweetness in love again.
love. wad is that?
a candy or bittergourd?
a chilli padi or lemon lime?
tasted all before.
taste bud numbed.
how should it taste like?
grandpa in hospital.
been a week.
mum sae condition worsen.
go c him before u dun get to c him again.
e same words when grandma lied in hospital e other time.
hates to c em in agony.
pains moi heart.
cant cry in front of em.
gotta be strong.
grandpa, u gotta be strong.
grandma pulled over. u can do it too.
jia you!
reali tired.
tmr will be wk 6 of school.
one more wk n it will be holidays.
endure.
one more month.
going to quit moi job.
endure.
jux want to slack ard doing nutink.
get somebody to dote on mi.
let mi feel e sweetness in love again.
love. wad is that?
a candy or bittergourd?
a chilli padi or lemon lime?
tasted all before.
taste bud numbed.
how should it taste like?
grandpa in hospital.
been a week.
mum sae condition worsen.
go c him before u dun get to c him again.
e same words when grandma lied in hospital e other time.
hates to c em in agony.
pains moi heart.
cant cry in front of em.
gotta be strong.
grandpa, u gotta be strong.
grandma pulled over. u can do it too.
jia you!
Saturday, May 20, 2006
missing somebody
one day neber contact
like end of the world
dey finali met up
n dey went out
he got jealous when she msg guys
reali jealous
did the story continue?
e picture remains blur
her heart hurts
she dun like to assume
she needs some confirmation
deep within she knew
he misses somebody
tat gal who made him changed alot
she had a dream
this time she dreamt of e goddess of mercy
e next thing tat came into her mind
tells her she needs to make a clear cut
her heart hurts
she knew tat long ago
but she hadnt been able to do so
she cudnt bear to
but she had to
tat morning
she wanted to tel him e three words
no matter how she phrased it
doesnt seems right
she ended up greeting him good morning
stupid gal
she knew one day
dey probably wud become strangers
she jux wanted to cherish
the remaining time wid him
she neber expected she wud haf this chance
is the heaven testing em?
onli heaven knows
when will be their next meeting?
next wk? next month?
or next yr?
haix.
one day neber contact
like end of the world
dey finali met up
n dey went out
he got jealous when she msg guys
reali jealous
did the story continue?
e picture remains blur
her heart hurts
she dun like to assume
she needs some confirmation
deep within she knew
he misses somebody
tat gal who made him changed alot
she had a dream
this time she dreamt of e goddess of mercy
e next thing tat came into her mind
tells her she needs to make a clear cut
her heart hurts
she knew tat long ago
but she hadnt been able to do so
she cudnt bear to
but she had to
tat morning
she wanted to tel him e three words
no matter how she phrased it
doesnt seems right
she ended up greeting him good morning
stupid gal
she knew one day
dey probably wud become strangers
she jux wanted to cherish
the remaining time wid him
she neber expected she wud haf this chance
is the heaven testing em?
onli heaven knows
when will be their next meeting?
next wk? next month?
or next yr?
haix.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
been admiring pretty gals lately
telling all moi friends who n who getting more attractive
until dey worried im going the crooked path
told mi to get a bf
haas
yesh
n i announced i wan to get a bf
a 2mth bf
jux b4 i leave for disney
cux i noe ppl wont wait for mi anyway
its jux to make sure im still straight
in fact i am straight
i think im falling in love wid somebody
somebody whom i shdnt haf
or probably he's jux a model
somebody i hope to haf
he's a good guy
considerate n thoughtful
haas
its so hard when i wan to get one
when i dun wan dere r so many in the waiting list
like taxis
owaes nowhere in sight when i need one
went jp wid aisyah today
seems like e firx time we go shopping alone
saw a nice pair of shoes
selling onli at 29.90
but dun haf moi size
other outlets oso dun haf
haiz
saw adidas pair, $109
whow
where do i get e money?
saw a jumper. nice.
think dey going to get it for mi.
moi belated bdae present.
heehee.
dun quite like e mp4 i got for bdae.
quite a hassle if i bring overseas.
tot of selling it away n get sumtink i wan instead.
but it doesnt seems right.
haix.
see. like i said.
dun assume wad im thinking.
u'll neber get it right.
i hate ppl who make assumptions.
cant u jux ask for some confirmation?
haix.
telling all moi friends who n who getting more attractive
until dey worried im going the crooked path
told mi to get a bf
haas
yesh
n i announced i wan to get a bf
a 2mth bf
jux b4 i leave for disney
cux i noe ppl wont wait for mi anyway
its jux to make sure im still straight
in fact i am straight
i think im falling in love wid somebody
somebody whom i shdnt haf
or probably he's jux a model
somebody i hope to haf
he's a good guy
considerate n thoughtful
haas
its so hard when i wan to get one
when i dun wan dere r so many in the waiting list
like taxis
owaes nowhere in sight when i need one
went jp wid aisyah today
seems like e firx time we go shopping alone
saw a nice pair of shoes
selling onli at 29.90
but dun haf moi size
other outlets oso dun haf
haiz
saw adidas pair, $109
whow
where do i get e money?
saw a jumper. nice.
think dey going to get it for mi.
moi belated bdae present.
heehee.
dun quite like e mp4 i got for bdae.
quite a hassle if i bring overseas.
tot of selling it away n get sumtink i wan instead.
but it doesnt seems right.
haix.
see. like i said.
dun assume wad im thinking.
u'll neber get it right.
i hate ppl who make assumptions.
cant u jux ask for some confirmation?
haix.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
its not easy to make a clear stand
when a once couple becomes friends
its a blessing tat dey r still in contact
tat dey can still confide in each other
when things go wrong
as they sometimes will
when the road u're trudging seems all uphill
and when u want to smile yet u have to sigh
when care is pressing u down a bit
rest if u must
but dun quit
for life is queer with its twist and turns
as everyone of us sometimes learns
and many a failure turned inside out
the silver tint of the cloud of doubt
and u never can tell how close
it may be near when it seems so far
so stick to the fight when u're hardest hit
its when things seem worst that u must not quit
when a once couple becomes friends
its a blessing tat dey r still in contact
tat dey can still confide in each other
when things go wrong
as they sometimes will
when the road u're trudging seems all uphill
and when u want to smile yet u have to sigh
when care is pressing u down a bit
rest if u must
but dun quit
for life is queer with its twist and turns
as everyone of us sometimes learns
and many a failure turned inside out
the silver tint of the cloud of doubt
and u never can tell how close
it may be near when it seems so far
so stick to the fight when u're hardest hit
its when things seem worst that u must not quit
Sunday, May 14, 2006
haas. dunno wad to sae.
went chu shi on moi bdae.
felt kinda cheated cux i was not needed at all.
cud haf gone ubin wid moi family.
cud haf gone dating.
ended up whole day wid moi whole bunch of grandsons.
failed to turn up for bdae dinner wid moi poly mates.
failed to turn up for bdae supper wid moi frend.
felt guilty.
ppl wanted so much to celebrate wid mi.
was kinda forced to go kbox wid em.
cux i was e main.
dey planned it secretly.
told mi onli on tat day itself.
everybody was so tired after a whole day of rain n shine.
dey din let em off.
wth.
full of complaints. i hated cy for ruining moi dae.
for spoiling moi pre-scheduled programmes.
but den i think again.
dey din expect things to turn out this way either.
dey put in the effort to organize.
to gif mi a surprise.
i shd appreciate it.
yes i did.
jux tat i dun like e way he do things.
be positive.
tats wad i told moiself.
at least. i got quite a few surprise this yr.
ppl whom i seldom contact wish mi too.
moi sec schmates celebrated wid mi too.
though i break moi tradition.
every yr, since one yrs old.
dere will be a cake.
no cake this yr.
jux felt like sumtink was missing.
no cake is like not bdae.
but i got an imaginary one over e fone.
haas.
special. a touching one.
thanx alot.
quite a few presents i received.
not all yet.
moi fav grandson gave mi a special one.
to replace e lost one. its a cushion.
for mi to bring over to disney.
to cuddle mi to slp everynite.
in case i miss home too much.
so thoughtful of him.
got a mp4. haven examine how to use.
looks like a camera.
got a sports bra too.
haas. lolx.
n e wallet tat i've been using was from moi son.
he got mi a handmade card too.
nice. love it.
thanx everybody.
went chu shi on moi bdae.
felt kinda cheated cux i was not needed at all.
cud haf gone ubin wid moi family.
cud haf gone dating.
ended up whole day wid moi whole bunch of grandsons.
failed to turn up for bdae dinner wid moi poly mates.
failed to turn up for bdae supper wid moi frend.
felt guilty.
ppl wanted so much to celebrate wid mi.
was kinda forced to go kbox wid em.
cux i was e main.
dey planned it secretly.
told mi onli on tat day itself.
everybody was so tired after a whole day of rain n shine.
dey din let em off.
wth.
full of complaints. i hated cy for ruining moi dae.
for spoiling moi pre-scheduled programmes.
but den i think again.
dey din expect things to turn out this way either.
dey put in the effort to organize.
to gif mi a surprise.
i shd appreciate it.
yes i did.
jux tat i dun like e way he do things.
be positive.
tats wad i told moiself.
at least. i got quite a few surprise this yr.
ppl whom i seldom contact wish mi too.
moi sec schmates celebrated wid mi too.
though i break moi tradition.
every yr, since one yrs old.
dere will be a cake.
no cake this yr.
jux felt like sumtink was missing.
no cake is like not bdae.
but i got an imaginary one over e fone.
haas.
special. a touching one.
thanx alot.
quite a few presents i received.
not all yet.
moi fav grandson gave mi a special one.
to replace e lost one. its a cushion.
for mi to bring over to disney.
to cuddle mi to slp everynite.
in case i miss home too much.
so thoughtful of him.
got a mp4. haven examine how to use.
looks like a camera.
got a sports bra too.
haas. lolx.
n e wallet tat i've been using was from moi son.
he got mi a handmade card too.
nice. love it.
thanx everybody.
Friday, May 12, 2006
gosh!! im so tired!!
haven been sleeping for the past 23hrs plus!!
woke up at 530am ytd.
reach home onli at 5am today.
omg.
n im now at work.
later still got a whole list of programs.
dun let mi be under e sun.
i will faint!
i even doze off while standing.
n i nearly fall on moi back.
oh mine oh mine!!
oh. n zouk was so boring!!
e songs are so... erkk!!
luckily when we passed by another.
butter factory.
good.
at least it belongs to our generation.
n we went in free!!
haas.
cux it was like 3.45am?
n dey r closing in 15mins.
lolx!!
dun feel like going chu shi eh.
ms lollipop, can i dun meet u today?
got ppl specially take off wan to celebrate wid mi wor!!
haas.
yesh yesh. its a him. HIM!!
hopefully he will appear somewhere later.
lalala.
happy birthday to mi!! ^_^
haven been sleeping for the past 23hrs plus!!
woke up at 530am ytd.
reach home onli at 5am today.
omg.
n im now at work.
later still got a whole list of programs.
dun let mi be under e sun.
i will faint!
i even doze off while standing.
n i nearly fall on moi back.
oh mine oh mine!!
oh. n zouk was so boring!!
e songs are so... erkk!!
luckily when we passed by another.
butter factory.
good.
at least it belongs to our generation.
n we went in free!!
haas.
cux it was like 3.45am?
n dey r closing in 15mins.
lolx!!
dun feel like going chu shi eh.
ms lollipop, can i dun meet u today?
got ppl specially take off wan to celebrate wid mi wor!!
haas.
yesh yesh. its a him. HIM!!
hopefully he will appear somewhere later.
lalala.
happy birthday to mi!! ^_^
Thursday, May 11, 2006
so many dates out of the blue.
mothers' day dinner.
bbq.
clubbing.
work.
chu shi.
bdae dinner.
supper.
gosh.
going to be so drained out.
pocket going to break a big hole.
panda eyes popping out.
oh. den dere's e sch projects n CAs coming up too.
n the meet-ups next wk.
omg.
tired.
but thanx alot friends.
i feel so honoured to be so welcomed by all of u.
but..
i haf a little wish.
can u guys pls spread out ur dates e next time??
dun cramp all ur gatherings wid mi on the same day..
i dun like to be walking zombie.
cux i'll scare e hell out of u!!
haas.
thanx alot.
love u guys.
mothers' day dinner.
bbq.
clubbing.
work.
chu shi.
bdae dinner.
supper.
gosh.
going to be so drained out.
pocket going to break a big hole.
panda eyes popping out.
oh. den dere's e sch projects n CAs coming up too.
n the meet-ups next wk.
omg.
tired.
but thanx alot friends.
i feel so honoured to be so welcomed by all of u.
but..
i haf a little wish.
can u guys pls spread out ur dates e next time??
dun cramp all ur gatherings wid mi on the same day..
i dun like to be walking zombie.
cux i'll scare e hell out of u!!
haas.
thanx alot.
love u guys.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
her fav grandson pass her a present today.
its big n nicely wrapped.
was curious.
but was told to open onli on the actual day.
anyway. thnx alot.
skip training today.
went sinseh.
ankle sprain.
again.
bandaged.
feel like handicapped.
so inflexible moving ard.
hurt her waist too.
e doctor smiled n said.
"u r such an easily hurt little gal"
haas.
mr doctor, im turning 19.
aint a little gal anymore.
not planning for celebrations.
mum asked her to go pulau ubin wid em.
family outing.
she said got chu shi.
her mum was like, "huh? its ur bdae leh.."
lolx. not in the mood for it anyway.
so hope e calendar will jux skip tat day, tat date.
more presents coming in.
cheer up.
its big n nicely wrapped.
was curious.
but was told to open onli on the actual day.
anyway. thnx alot.
skip training today.
went sinseh.
ankle sprain.
again.
bandaged.
feel like handicapped.
so inflexible moving ard.
hurt her waist too.
e doctor smiled n said.
"u r such an easily hurt little gal"
haas.
mr doctor, im turning 19.
aint a little gal anymore.
not planning for celebrations.
mum asked her to go pulau ubin wid em.
family outing.
she said got chu shi.
her mum was like, "huh? its ur bdae leh.."
lolx. not in the mood for it anyway.
so hope e calendar will jux skip tat day, tat date.
more presents coming in.
cheer up.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
everything's jux not right.
flip thru e photos.
feelings came back again.
tot it alrdy faded?
haven been able to put it down. haf i?
was jux wondering.
if one day. i go up to him n sae.
"bb, can we go back to the times we used to be?"
wad will be his reply?
think too much le ba.
went movies ytd.
mi3. nice. thrilling.
dunno y.
tot of him.
so hope so much e one sitting beside mi ish him.
haix.
dunno. everything's jux not getting right.
supposed to go chu shi.
ppl help mi take moi shoe.
yet i stil m.i.a.
im jux so slack. so restless.
so moodless.
been so easily irritated nowadays.
scolding everybody for nutink.
keeping a distance to everyone.
help!! im not moiself!!
y ish this happening to mi!!
arghhhhh!!!
flip thru e photos.
feelings came back again.
tot it alrdy faded?
haven been able to put it down. haf i?
was jux wondering.
if one day. i go up to him n sae.
"bb, can we go back to the times we used to be?"
wad will be his reply?
think too much le ba.
went movies ytd.
mi3. nice. thrilling.
dunno y.
tot of him.
so hope so much e one sitting beside mi ish him.
haix.
dunno. everything's jux not getting right.
supposed to go chu shi.
ppl help mi take moi shoe.
yet i stil m.i.a.
im jux so slack. so restless.
so moodless.
been so easily irritated nowadays.
scolding everybody for nutink.
keeping a distance to everyone.
help!! im not moiself!!
y ish this happening to mi!!
arghhhhh!!!
Friday, May 05, 2006
she keep dreaming of him. even dreamt of him going disney wid her.
haas. she missed him too much??
probably.
she got so excited when she receives his msg.
even though it was onli a forward msg.
at least he still remember her existence.
it was like months ago.
when dey firx broke off.
n when she received a forward msg from him for the firx time.
it was e same feeling.
days ago. she told her grandsons.
she need a break. badly.
she's too tired she feel like giving up everything.
mentally + physically.
she's jux tired.
disappointed too.
to noe she's seems to be e onli one who loves dragon alot.
somehow. she feels she's not needed.
she feels kinda extra.
haiz.
had her firx cooking lesson today.
teriyaki chicken.
daddy wans her to master her cooking before she leaves for disney.
mummy bought her e ingredients while she was asleep.
see the way she put in the chicken wings.
her mum laughs.
say she's like qian jin da xiao jie.
haha.
but e dish was nice.
for the firx time.
she cooked sumtink for her mum. =)
shall cook a proper meal on mothers' day.
haas. she missed him too much??
probably.
she got so excited when she receives his msg.
even though it was onli a forward msg.
at least he still remember her existence.
it was like months ago.
when dey firx broke off.
n when she received a forward msg from him for the firx time.
it was e same feeling.
days ago. she told her grandsons.
she need a break. badly.
she's too tired she feel like giving up everything.
mentally + physically.
she's jux tired.
disappointed too.
to noe she's seems to be e onli one who loves dragon alot.
somehow. she feels she's not needed.
she feels kinda extra.
haiz.
had her firx cooking lesson today.
teriyaki chicken.
daddy wans her to master her cooking before she leaves for disney.
mummy bought her e ingredients while she was asleep.
see the way she put in the chicken wings.
her mum laughs.
say she's like qian jin da xiao jie.
haha.
but e dish was nice.
for the firx time.
she cooked sumtink for her mum. =)
shall cook a proper meal on mothers' day.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
oh.. im getting so sick n tired of the trainings.. ppl r getting lesser.. todae not even half the numbers.. the working ones n the fallen sick ones r enuff to keep the dragon not moving.. gosh..
im jux so bored at the training today.. dey went kbox ytd.. none of em called mi along.. to think i owaes organise gatherings for em.. forget it.. im becoming more n more invisible.. one day, i will jux go missing.. moi leg is giving troubles.. i merely take a few steps back n it starts to hurt.. yesh.. n dere i start to limp again.. wth.. gotta go back for checkup one of these days..
we were jux planning for celebration this afternoon.. cux cw's bdae ish jux one day behind mine.. tot of celebrating it tgt.. was said to fix it on sat.. moi darling aisyah will be coming too.. yippee.. den again.. gotta c if kevin (cw's bf) can take off to keep her poor little darling accompany anot.. hopefully he can.. den everything will be smoothly carried out as planned..
we even tot of baking our own bdae cake.. she wans strawberry.. i wanted chocolate.. so tat will make it half of each flavour.. lolx..
cy jux reminded mi vesak day gotta chu shi.. big event.. got dragon, lion n big flag.. heard ish laoda's mum sintua.. sumore its in e morning.. wth.. am i reali going to celebrate moi dae wid e buddhas n lollipop?? da-shu say after chu shi den go happening.. haiz.. seems like i cant go missing huh?? quick.. somebody date mi on moi dae!!
was on moi way home jux now.. n saw an old auntie's wake.. one of a kind.. bery neat n tidy.. still got buddha at the side de.. bery nicely done.. den it reminded mi of the dream..
quite some time ago, i dreamt moi mum left us to another world.. she was lying in the coffin.. i was so scared when i woke up.. moi heart beat so fast.. until i saw moi mum safe n sound.. i actuali forgotten abt it le.. den e wake reminded mi again..
jux now watch da chang jin.. lady han oso die.. oh mine.. n i went sobbing in e toilet when i think of the dream i had.. oh pls.. pls do not let tat dream of mine come true.. pls dun..
where's moi darling.. can u lend mi a hug.. a real tite hug.. tel mi e dream is not going to come true.. tel mi mummy is going to live to ripe old age.. tel mi her failing health is not a signal.. tel mi mummy is going to be fine..
darling.. where r u??
i dun haf one.. ='(
im jux a nobody.. a lonely soul.. an empty shell..
when a triangle becomes parallel lines..
i give moi blessings..
cux parallel lines never meet..
thanx for the memories..
ilu.
im jux so bored at the training today.. dey went kbox ytd.. none of em called mi along.. to think i owaes organise gatherings for em.. forget it.. im becoming more n more invisible.. one day, i will jux go missing.. moi leg is giving troubles.. i merely take a few steps back n it starts to hurt.. yesh.. n dere i start to limp again.. wth.. gotta go back for checkup one of these days..
we were jux planning for celebration this afternoon.. cux cw's bdae ish jux one day behind mine.. tot of celebrating it tgt.. was said to fix it on sat.. moi darling aisyah will be coming too.. yippee.. den again.. gotta c if kevin (cw's bf) can take off to keep her poor little darling accompany anot.. hopefully he can.. den everything will be smoothly carried out as planned..
we even tot of baking our own bdae cake.. she wans strawberry.. i wanted chocolate.. so tat will make it half of each flavour.. lolx..
cy jux reminded mi vesak day gotta chu shi.. big event.. got dragon, lion n big flag.. heard ish laoda's mum sintua.. sumore its in e morning.. wth.. am i reali going to celebrate moi dae wid e buddhas n lollipop?? da-shu say after chu shi den go happening.. haiz.. seems like i cant go missing huh?? quick.. somebody date mi on moi dae!!
was on moi way home jux now.. n saw an old auntie's wake.. one of a kind.. bery neat n tidy.. still got buddha at the side de.. bery nicely done.. den it reminded mi of the dream..
quite some time ago, i dreamt moi mum left us to another world.. she was lying in the coffin.. i was so scared when i woke up.. moi heart beat so fast.. until i saw moi mum safe n sound.. i actuali forgotten abt it le.. den e wake reminded mi again..
jux now watch da chang jin.. lady han oso die.. oh mine.. n i went sobbing in e toilet when i think of the dream i had.. oh pls.. pls do not let tat dream of mine come true.. pls dun..
where's moi darling.. can u lend mi a hug.. a real tite hug.. tel mi e dream is not going to come true.. tel mi mummy is going to live to ripe old age.. tel mi her failing health is not a signal.. tel mi mummy is going to be fine..
darling.. where r u??
i dun haf one.. ='(
im jux a nobody.. a lonely soul.. an empty shell..
when a triangle becomes parallel lines..
i give moi blessings..
cux parallel lines never meet..
thanx for the memories..
ilu.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
jh asked how am i going to spend moi bdae.. i said dunno.. probably spending e nite wid moi sisters.. yearly routine.. haas.. e question keeps mi wondering.. im owaes e one organizing gatherings n surprises.. when will it be moi turn to wait for anybody's surprises?? i dun think dere will ever be ba.. im jux so envious of all those who r so fortunate..
went jb ytd wid zq dey all.. finali.. we haf been saying it for like half a yr.. haas..
it was real crowded.. how i wished e m'sia govt will improve e ventilation at the custom.. anyway.. i managed to survive.. whew!! e queue was like almost an hour.. cant imagine how did i survive thru e lack of fresh air.. n moi height ish like.. u noe..
so we went city square.. yepz.. our main purpose was shopping.. but we were hungry after tat long n tedious waiting at the custom.. so we went for lunch at secret recipe.. gosh.. i onli ate tat at singapore on thursday.. dere am i eating at the same restaurant again on sunday.. wth..
luckily dere was much more variety.. n e food did taste nice.. up to the standard.. but e service sucks.. e time we waited to be served was so much more den e time we spent on eating.. it was like double! omg.. n we waited so long for tat 3ringgit change!! well.. their service was bad.. we jux dun wan to give em tips!~ lalala...
alright.. tat shopping mall ish reali mega.. i mux say.. we actuali lost each other in e mall.. so it was like mi, zq n cw spent like abt one hr searching for e other 3.. den to realise dey actuali went back to the converse shop.. -_-!!
i guess grace was the one wid the fruitiest labour.. she bought a bag, a shirt, a sweater n a pair of clogs.. like shopping for new yr.. lolx.. hmm.. i onli bought a top.. wanted to get tat pair of canvas.. pretty nice.. n its onli abt sgd25!! but its white.. dun quite match moi clothings.. nvm.. shall look again.. e one in moi friendster is nice.. lets hope i can get sumtink similar.. ch sae he will get mi a pair for present.. cuz im owaes wearing tat old canvas.. n its going to be worn out pretty soon.. haas..
oh.. n i saw so many shawls!! saw e one i like.. n e specs!! its purple n black.. perfect!! exactly the colour im looking for.. but i saw it when e other 3 went missing.. gotta find em.. in the end.. i neber buy.. wad a waste.. yepz.. n e bikinis too!! selling at sgd35!! gosh.. i wan to go back dere again!! how i wished i had brought enuff money.. den i wud haf gotten all the bargains.. awww..
nvm.. i will be going kl in june.. hee.. was jux discussing wid mummy.. she owaes wanted to take the train.. yepz.. so we will be going via train.. im jux so excited.. shopping!! n yesh yesh.. e whole family will be going together.. i jux miss family outing.. been so long we go out together cux im owaes e missing one.. shall not work too much.. i need a break before moi disney attachment too..
im jux thinking.. i wan a fully packed bdae.. kbox till 7pm.. den go dinner.. after dinner go clubbing.. whahaha.. dunno can tahan anot.. gotta work in the morning wor.. 530am mux wake up liao.. *faint*
hopefully moi poly khakis can make it on tat day ba.. den moi plan can be fulfilled le.. if not, i gotta guai guai go chu chi n celebrate wid the buddhas le.. it jux so happens tat vesak day ish moi lunar bdae.. lolx..
counting down to moi bdae.. 10 more days to go.. 6_^
went jb ytd wid zq dey all.. finali.. we haf been saying it for like half a yr.. haas..
it was real crowded.. how i wished e m'sia govt will improve e ventilation at the custom.. anyway.. i managed to survive.. whew!! e queue was like almost an hour.. cant imagine how did i survive thru e lack of fresh air.. n moi height ish like.. u noe..
so we went city square.. yepz.. our main purpose was shopping.. but we were hungry after tat long n tedious waiting at the custom.. so we went for lunch at secret recipe.. gosh.. i onli ate tat at singapore on thursday.. dere am i eating at the same restaurant again on sunday.. wth..
luckily dere was much more variety.. n e food did taste nice.. up to the standard.. but e service sucks.. e time we waited to be served was so much more den e time we spent on eating.. it was like double! omg.. n we waited so long for tat 3ringgit change!! well.. their service was bad.. we jux dun wan to give em tips!~ lalala...
alright.. tat shopping mall ish reali mega.. i mux say.. we actuali lost each other in e mall.. so it was like mi, zq n cw spent like abt one hr searching for e other 3.. den to realise dey actuali went back to the converse shop.. -_-!!
i guess grace was the one wid the fruitiest labour.. she bought a bag, a shirt, a sweater n a pair of clogs.. like shopping for new yr.. lolx.. hmm.. i onli bought a top.. wanted to get tat pair of canvas.. pretty nice.. n its onli abt sgd25!! but its white.. dun quite match moi clothings.. nvm.. shall look again.. e one in moi friendster is nice.. lets hope i can get sumtink similar.. ch sae he will get mi a pair for present.. cuz im owaes wearing tat old canvas.. n its going to be worn out pretty soon.. haas..
oh.. n i saw so many shawls!! saw e one i like.. n e specs!! its purple n black.. perfect!! exactly the colour im looking for.. but i saw it when e other 3 went missing.. gotta find em.. in the end.. i neber buy.. wad a waste.. yepz.. n e bikinis too!! selling at sgd35!! gosh.. i wan to go back dere again!! how i wished i had brought enuff money.. den i wud haf gotten all the bargains.. awww..
nvm.. i will be going kl in june.. hee.. was jux discussing wid mummy.. she owaes wanted to take the train.. yepz.. so we will be going via train.. im jux so excited.. shopping!! n yesh yesh.. e whole family will be going together.. i jux miss family outing.. been so long we go out together cux im owaes e missing one.. shall not work too much.. i need a break before moi disney attachment too..
im jux thinking.. i wan a fully packed bdae.. kbox till 7pm.. den go dinner.. after dinner go clubbing.. whahaha.. dunno can tahan anot.. gotta work in the morning wor.. 530am mux wake up liao.. *faint*
hopefully moi poly khakis can make it on tat day ba.. den moi plan can be fulfilled le.. if not, i gotta guai guai go chu chi n celebrate wid the buddhas le.. it jux so happens tat vesak day ish moi lunar bdae.. lolx..
counting down to moi bdae.. 10 more days to go.. 6_^
Sunday, April 30, 2006
gosh.. im hungry!! at this hour?! n i asked moi mum to get mi hokkien mee?! she will onli be back by 2am, the earliest.. omg.. going to be fat fat fat!! whahaha.. aiya.. dun care la.. who cares anyway.. heehee..
went tampines mall today.. hmm.. can u imagine.. its moi firx time dere!! nineteen yrs in singapore?! lolx!! so crowded.. so many things so much food!! food!! oopz.. heehee..
hmm.. accompanied ch go c hp.. so many ppl!! e queue was like outside e shop le.. at e neighbour shop le lor.. omg.. ppl nowadays bery rich arh.. mux be e govt package.. y i dun haf?!! when will it be moi turn to be rich oso?? i saw e new version of fx9.. called fx01.. e specs bery good sia.. courts selling at 699.. two 512mb SD memory card.. going to check out other places.. hopefully got cheap cheap one.. heehee..
oh ya.. guess who i saw? raymond!! so long neber c him le!! e last time we met was like at pizza hut? or in school? anyway.. he working as promoter dere now.. neber change.. still so nice to chat chat.. haas.. wonder hows other colleagues.. we used to work at pizza hut.. owaes fooling together.. pinching on food.. wiping the tables.. battling wid the customers.. wonderful memories.. love em lots..
somehow.. been happier these days?? becuz i found a new place to shop? or am i excited cux im going johor wid moi friends tmr!! finali not working!! can haf a break.. n we r going shopping!! i miss moi shopping days.. been working almost everyday.. so tired.. so stressed..
recently realised.. wad i study n wad i haf to noe is way beyond wad e sch teaches.. i violated e labour law.. until mama explained to mi.. which means, auntie is right this time..
mama sae i nid to noe e labour law.. n im studying tourism law.. last sem i did biz law.. y so many laws?!! aiyo.. den nid to noe moi geography bery well.. at moi fingertips.. nid to noe this.. nid to noe tat.. practically everything under e sky!! how much more can i take??
im tired.. reali tired.. feel like giving up everything now..
where's moi darling?? do u still exist??
i nid ur shoulder.. i nid a hug.. can i??
can i stil hold on to tat belief of mine??
went tampines mall today.. hmm.. can u imagine.. its moi firx time dere!! nineteen yrs in singapore?! lolx!! so crowded.. so many things so much food!! food!! oopz.. heehee..
hmm.. accompanied ch go c hp.. so many ppl!! e queue was like outside e shop le.. at e neighbour shop le lor.. omg.. ppl nowadays bery rich arh.. mux be e govt package.. y i dun haf?!! when will it be moi turn to be rich oso?? i saw e new version of fx9.. called fx01.. e specs bery good sia.. courts selling at 699.. two 512mb SD memory card.. going to check out other places.. hopefully got cheap cheap one.. heehee..
oh ya.. guess who i saw? raymond!! so long neber c him le!! e last time we met was like at pizza hut? or in school? anyway.. he working as promoter dere now.. neber change.. still so nice to chat chat.. haas.. wonder hows other colleagues.. we used to work at pizza hut.. owaes fooling together.. pinching on food.. wiping the tables.. battling wid the customers.. wonderful memories.. love em lots..
somehow.. been happier these days?? becuz i found a new place to shop? or am i excited cux im going johor wid moi friends tmr!! finali not working!! can haf a break.. n we r going shopping!! i miss moi shopping days.. been working almost everyday.. so tired.. so stressed..
recently realised.. wad i study n wad i haf to noe is way beyond wad e sch teaches.. i violated e labour law.. until mama explained to mi.. which means, auntie is right this time..
mama sae i nid to noe e labour law.. n im studying tourism law.. last sem i did biz law.. y so many laws?!! aiyo.. den nid to noe moi geography bery well.. at moi fingertips.. nid to noe this.. nid to noe tat.. practically everything under e sky!! how much more can i take??
im tired.. reali tired.. feel like giving up everything now..
where's moi darling?? do u still exist??
i nid ur shoulder.. i nid a hug.. can i??
can i stil hold on to tat belief of mine??
Thursday, April 27, 2006
shit auntie!! damn it!! go n die!! fark!! cant she be more flexible?!! u ate meesiam at 10am!! now u wan to go for ur lunch?!! wth!! i dun wan to go break at 12pm.. canot huh?? 12pm peak hour.. so many ppl.. i went half hr later den got seats.. cannot huh?? i gave in to u.. neber quarrel wid u.. give u face liao.. wad else u wan?!! tot u changed for e better.. u din!! ur old self resurfaced!! wth.. fark u!! i dun wan to work wid u eva again!! u better report sick on moi bdae!! dun wan to c u!! not at all!!!
she came to noe abt sumtink she wished she had neber knew.
actuali she knew.
ppl concerned asked y she neber turn up at the chalet.
she was glad she din.
she cant imagine how things were going to be.
she felt cheated. betrayed.
no longer e person she used to noe.
a moment ago. she was swearing at him.
hated him to the core.
den all the anger vanished.
at a blink of an eye.
the next thing she knew.
utter disappointment.
she dunno how she shd be feeling anymore.
friends asked. wad plans haf she got for her bdae.
she said dunno.
she wans to gif privilege to the impt ones. she replied.
e fact is. she's waiting.
for tat somebody to celebrate wid her.
e promise.
she knew. its over.
she knew. her heart is dead.
yet she's not fully awake.
wake her up. somebody pls.
she dun wish to become a crooked.
all her beautiful wedding plans will be gone.
or well. it's alrdy gone.
haas.
actuali she knew.
ppl concerned asked y she neber turn up at the chalet.
she was glad she din.
she cant imagine how things were going to be.
she felt cheated. betrayed.
no longer e person she used to noe.
a moment ago. she was swearing at him.
hated him to the core.
den all the anger vanished.
at a blink of an eye.
the next thing she knew.
utter disappointment.
she dunno how she shd be feeling anymore.
friends asked. wad plans haf she got for her bdae.
she said dunno.
she wans to gif privilege to the impt ones. she replied.
e fact is. she's waiting.
for tat somebody to celebrate wid her.
e promise.
she knew. its over.
she knew. her heart is dead.
yet she's not fully awake.
wake her up. somebody pls.
she dun wish to become a crooked.
all her beautiful wedding plans will be gone.
or well. it's alrdy gone.
haas.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Sunday, April 23, 2006
im at a lost of words. nellie confessed her feelings for mi. said she got attracted to mi. i mean i din discrimate her la. but reali dunno wad to sae when she asked whther she can be nice to mi. gosh. i cant possibly sae no. its going to break her heart. but wad wud happen if i sae yes?
oh mine.
aiya. dunno la. jux now went imm. queued so long jux to pay for TWO cheesecakes. wth. queue until moi waist ish hurting again. wanted to do tutorial. not in e mood le. i cant even sit down. it hurts. like hell. somebody help... im dying.
cy msg mi. sae vesak day may haf to chu shi. haas. moi bdae. c how ba. if no program den go chu shi lor. celebrate qian qiu wor. lolx. actuali kinda disappointed la. i oso dunno. feeling kinda moody. y no ppl wan to celebrate bdae for mi?? haix.
wlcs kids go chalet. was to celebrate xl's bdae in advance. guess dey forget abt mine le ba. last yr we celebrated tgt. cux our bdaes were onli a wk difference. ts called mi to go. he's e onli one. den i heard he wan to jio mi. wth. no wonder col mi almost everydae. thankfully he stop liao. when we were p5 he sae he like mi. all e way until we were sec3. he neber succeeded. n he was real hurt when i made a clear n decisive cut. he even cried in sch. luckily we remained as friends. now ish like 4yrs liao. stil like mi meh? bu hui ba. guess its jux a moment of chong dong ba. haas.
todae work wid auntie shirley. it went smoothly. i mean yesh, we did manage to chat a little. whew. thursday morning going to work wid her again. wha. morning no customers de wor. lets hope everything will be alright ba. afterall, she did become a better person. not as demanding as before. no longer a big bully.
im tired. bye.
oh mine.
aiya. dunno la. jux now went imm. queued so long jux to pay for TWO cheesecakes. wth. queue until moi waist ish hurting again. wanted to do tutorial. not in e mood le. i cant even sit down. it hurts. like hell. somebody help... im dying.
cy msg mi. sae vesak day may haf to chu shi. haas. moi bdae. c how ba. if no program den go chu shi lor. celebrate qian qiu wor. lolx. actuali kinda disappointed la. i oso dunno. feeling kinda moody. y no ppl wan to celebrate bdae for mi?? haix.
wlcs kids go chalet. was to celebrate xl's bdae in advance. guess dey forget abt mine le ba. last yr we celebrated tgt. cux our bdaes were onli a wk difference. ts called mi to go. he's e onli one. den i heard he wan to jio mi. wth. no wonder col mi almost everydae. thankfully he stop liao. when we were p5 he sae he like mi. all e way until we were sec3. he neber succeeded. n he was real hurt when i made a clear n decisive cut. he even cried in sch. luckily we remained as friends. now ish like 4yrs liao. stil like mi meh? bu hui ba. guess its jux a moment of chong dong ba. haas.
todae work wid auntie shirley. it went smoothly. i mean yesh, we did manage to chat a little. whew. thursday morning going to work wid her again. wha. morning no customers de wor. lets hope everything will be alright ba. afterall, she did become a better person. not as demanding as before. no longer a big bully.
im tired. bye.
went to work on fridae.. wid moi usual partner.. but he dun seems alrite.. he's weird tat dae.. kinda short-tempered.. dunno wad happen.. later he said he's jux worn out.. hmm.. hope so ba..
den went back wid moi juniors.. e hyper-active bunch.. nellie scared e hell out of mi.. she kinda real concerned abt mi.. asking things like whether im attached.. whether i need her to send mi home.. gosh! its not like her!!
den she started msging mi.. ask all she could ask.. moi private life.. omg.. until she finali reveal.. i caught her attention.. tats y she's curious.. n wans to noe everything abt mi.. lolx!!
still remember e other time went mos wid moi khakis.. dey were curious too.. cux.. im attracting both genders!! hmm.. am i so attractive?! haas..
went for gathering wid moi sisters jux now.. but left kinda hurriedly.. din even touch e food.. feeling so guilty.. i dun meet them often.. once in a few months.. i noe dey miss mi lots.. haiz.. other den sorry.. i reali dunno wad to sae.. e gap btw us r getting bigger.. 4+1=5
was discussing wid seng abt bdae plans.. going to be free for the whole dae.. gosh.. no way.. i wan to celebrate!! all the way from morning to late midnight.. i wan to be kept busy!!
was thinking abt bbq.. den to realise will be having bbq e previous nite..
clubbing.. not all can enter.. too ex..
chalet.. exceed budget.. actual day fully booked..
kbox.. exceed budget..
how how how???
den moi dear son came up wid a vegetarian trip.. cux its vesak day.. lolx!!
shall see to it den.. heehee..
by the way.. im selected to go attachment at disneyworld, florida!! will be leaving this coming end august if everything goes smoothly.. it will be a half yr trip.. until mid feb if im not wrong.. yippee!! im going for holiday!!
but im going to miss watching lion com at taka this yr.. n e daylight dragon com.. awww.. i neber miss them!! will someone record the whole thing n send it to mi when im in florida?? haas.. wth..
-i wished i wished-
this trip to florida will be an enriching one..
allow mi to forget all the unhappinness..
bring moi soul n heart back to mi..
give mi some enlightenment..
tel mi wad im doing ish not wrong..
tel mi i am still mi..
tel mi all ish not lost..
arghhhh... dun wan to think liao la.. wth..
will somebody buy mi a digi cam?? i wish i wish -_-
den went back wid moi juniors.. e hyper-active bunch.. nellie scared e hell out of mi.. she kinda real concerned abt mi.. asking things like whether im attached.. whether i need her to send mi home.. gosh! its not like her!!
den she started msging mi.. ask all she could ask.. moi private life.. omg.. until she finali reveal.. i caught her attention.. tats y she's curious.. n wans to noe everything abt mi.. lolx!!
still remember e other time went mos wid moi khakis.. dey were curious too.. cux.. im attracting both genders!! hmm.. am i so attractive?! haas..
went for gathering wid moi sisters jux now.. but left kinda hurriedly.. din even touch e food.. feeling so guilty.. i dun meet them often.. once in a few months.. i noe dey miss mi lots.. haiz.. other den sorry.. i reali dunno wad to sae.. e gap btw us r getting bigger.. 4+1=5
was discussing wid seng abt bdae plans.. going to be free for the whole dae.. gosh.. no way.. i wan to celebrate!! all the way from morning to late midnight.. i wan to be kept busy!!
was thinking abt bbq.. den to realise will be having bbq e previous nite..
clubbing.. not all can enter.. too ex..
chalet.. exceed budget.. actual day fully booked..
kbox.. exceed budget..
how how how???
den moi dear son came up wid a vegetarian trip.. cux its vesak day.. lolx!!
shall see to it den.. heehee..
by the way.. im selected to go attachment at disneyworld, florida!! will be leaving this coming end august if everything goes smoothly.. it will be a half yr trip.. until mid feb if im not wrong.. yippee!! im going for holiday!!
but im going to miss watching lion com at taka this yr.. n e daylight dragon com.. awww.. i neber miss them!! will someone record the whole thing n send it to mi when im in florida?? haas.. wth..
-i wished i wished-
this trip to florida will be an enriching one..
allow mi to forget all the unhappinness..
bring moi soul n heart back to mi..
give mi some enlightenment..
tel mi wad im doing ish not wrong..
tel mi i am still mi..
tel mi all ish not lost..
arghhhh... dun wan to think liao la.. wth..
will somebody buy mi a digi cam?? i wish i wish -_-
Thursday, April 20, 2006
caught in between. one has to let go eventuali.
aint feeling good.
guess tats the best way out.
the drama finali come to a stop.
its last episode.
mood not right. soul disappeared.
ppl wonders.
wads wrong wid her?
her old self is coming back.
the hot-tempered n unfriendly gal.
she's shutting out.
gonna lose her friends.
urge to haf somebody to depend on.
yet not opening up the line for queue.
no. she's not going to.
tired.
thursday. her off day.
wake up at 530.
work. again.
needs a break.
needs some light.
in the world of darkness.
lost.
hope he's doing fine.
1+1 = 2
aint feeling good.
guess tats the best way out.
the drama finali come to a stop.
its last episode.
mood not right. soul disappeared.
ppl wonders.
wads wrong wid her?
her old self is coming back.
the hot-tempered n unfriendly gal.
she's shutting out.
gonna lose her friends.
urge to haf somebody to depend on.
yet not opening up the line for queue.
no. she's not going to.
tired.
thursday. her off day.
wake up at 530.
work. again.
needs a break.
needs some light.
in the world of darkness.
lost.
hope he's doing fine.
1+1 = 2
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
as days pass. her bdae getting nearer.
friends r asking, "wad do u wan for a present?"
she ponders.
e things she needs r real expensive.
she noes dey cant possibly afford.
she wanted a digi cam since yrs ago.
now she needs a thumbdrive to store her doc too.
she wish she had another pair of shoes to interchange.
she wans a new hp.
a laptop. light n wireless.
wad she needs if she goes disney.
today. she was told. 90% of all r going.
onli a gal or 2 r tot not suitable.
shd noe e results by tis weekend.
dun dare to put too much hope.
e higher e expectations. e higher e disappointment.
on the way home. she looked out into the forest.
dark. n felt lonely.
memories flash back.
her best fren asked her abt her ex.
n was caught surprised.
haas.
no contact. she knew tis was going to be.
she missed e times when dey cud joke abt their past.
dey seems so close den.
now so cold.
or maybe e weather is cold.
unstabilised emotions.
she told herself. leave him alone.
"u knew he needed a break"
catch up wid him when he does so ba.
like how it used to be.
for the time being. let it be.
once again. fallen.
friends r asking, "wad do u wan for a present?"
she ponders.
e things she needs r real expensive.
she noes dey cant possibly afford.
she wanted a digi cam since yrs ago.
now she needs a thumbdrive to store her doc too.
she wish she had another pair of shoes to interchange.
she wans a new hp.
a laptop. light n wireless.
wad she needs if she goes disney.
today. she was told. 90% of all r going.
onli a gal or 2 r tot not suitable.
shd noe e results by tis weekend.
dun dare to put too much hope.
e higher e expectations. e higher e disappointment.
on the way home. she looked out into the forest.
dark. n felt lonely.
memories flash back.
her best fren asked her abt her ex.
n was caught surprised.
haas.
no contact. she knew tis was going to be.
she missed e times when dey cud joke abt their past.
dey seems so close den.
now so cold.
or maybe e weather is cold.
unstabilised emotions.
she told herself. leave him alone.
"u knew he needed a break"
catch up wid him when he does so ba.
like how it used to be.
for the time being. let it be.
once again. fallen.
Sunday, April 16, 2006
omg!! im laughing non-stop!! i finali found the song!! "lu bing hua" heehee..
kk.. here goes the next episode..
its no longer a game of two. e ppl dey noe.
too many the same. the connection btw em.
she was told to keep a distance. she heard sumtink she dun quite believe.
she clarified. n get the whole picture.
she knew.
hope she did the right thing.
she simplified the whole thing. feeling so much relaxed.
so much happier now. it was simple in the firx place.
she tot too much. her mood got affected.
she wans to say sorry to her precious son.
she apologise for her attitude.
she thanks everybody for cheering her up.
she thanks the monkey especially n her son.
not forgeting the one who col her obaacchan.
she wans to tel them.
she wans to shout to them.
"granny has revived!!"
she read his past entries. she realised.
she was probably correct. he said she was half rite.
love is not abt sacrificing. but when a guy is willing to e gal means alot to him.
dey r past tense. he came back probably he cudnt forget.
their past was a special one afterall.
she's alrdy contented she's remembered.
follow ur heart.
kk.. here goes the next episode..
its no longer a game of two. e ppl dey noe.
too many the same. the connection btw em.
she was told to keep a distance. she heard sumtink she dun quite believe.
she clarified. n get the whole picture.
she knew.
hope she did the right thing.
she simplified the whole thing. feeling so much relaxed.
so much happier now. it was simple in the firx place.
she tot too much. her mood got affected.
she wans to say sorry to her precious son.
she apologise for her attitude.
she thanks everybody for cheering her up.
she thanks the monkey especially n her son.
not forgeting the one who col her obaacchan.
she wans to tel them.
she wans to shout to them.
"granny has revived!!"
she read his past entries. she realised.
she was probably correct. he said she was half rite.
love is not abt sacrificing. but when a guy is willing to e gal means alot to him.
dey r past tense. he came back probably he cudnt forget.
their past was a special one afterall.
she's alrdy contented she's remembered.
follow ur heart.
she saw em. n she hide away.
somehow she jux dun wan em to c her.
she saw him. stil as charming.
haas. wth.
she dunno wads going on in her.
fickle minded.
she's afraid she made e wrong decision again.
opportunities dun owaes come.
she's upset. dey onli inform her last minute.
everything was in a chaos.
made her brother wait in the rain.
n missed his outing wid his friends.
when everything shd haf left as it is.
she felt guilty.
waist hurting. old injury.
onli her n the empty house.
sometimes she jux wished dey hadnt moved.
empty heart. she wished he was here.
to spend the night wid her.
keep her accompany.
like how dey used to be.
nomore. story ended.
she realised. seems like everywhere he is 'she' wil be dere.
she noes his feelings.
but she dunno wad to do.
lost. no sense of directions.
sometimes she wonders.
is she doing the right thing?
she told herself she has reached her final destination.
has he?
he comes n go.
were dey meant to be?
somehow she jux dun wan em to c her.
she saw him. stil as charming.
haas. wth.
she dunno wads going on in her.
fickle minded.
she's afraid she made e wrong decision again.
opportunities dun owaes come.
she's upset. dey onli inform her last minute.
everything was in a chaos.
made her brother wait in the rain.
n missed his outing wid his friends.
when everything shd haf left as it is.
she felt guilty.
waist hurting. old injury.
onli her n the empty house.
sometimes she jux wished dey hadnt moved.
empty heart. she wished he was here.
to spend the night wid her.
keep her accompany.
like how dey used to be.
nomore. story ended.
she realised. seems like everywhere he is 'she' wil be dere.
she noes his feelings.
but she dunno wad to do.
lost. no sense of directions.
sometimes she wonders.
is she doing the right thing?
she told herself she has reached her final destination.
has he?
he comes n go.
were dey meant to be?
Saturday, April 15, 2006
knot finali untied. tots n feelings poured out.
decision made. it hurts. she wanted to cry but tears wudnt flow.
tears no more. dried.
e bullet in her heart pulled out. blood flow non-stop.
officially pronounced dead.
on the same nite. she made another heartaching decision.
she going to leave her grandsons.
her favourite lollipop.
somehow she is willing to sacrifice. she dunno y.
behind his back. she tries her best to help him peace out.
he dint noe. probably will never noe.
she's glad. things arent so complicated for him anymore.
at least she managed to tok to another her.
and convinced her.
she wish him all the best.
for she gonna be gone.
forever.
decision made. it hurts. she wanted to cry but tears wudnt flow.
tears no more. dried.
e bullet in her heart pulled out. blood flow non-stop.
officially pronounced dead.
on the same nite. she made another heartaching decision.
she going to leave her grandsons.
her favourite lollipop.
somehow she is willing to sacrifice. she dunno y.
behind his back. she tries her best to help him peace out.
he dint noe. probably will never noe.
she's glad. things arent so complicated for him anymore.
at least she managed to tok to another her.
and convinced her.
she wish him all the best.
for she gonna be gone.
forever.
guess staying home a day did help sort out her tots.. special thanx to her hyper active grandson.. the monkey.. haha.. n many thanx to all who haf been trying to cheer her up.. she promised to keep spld going.. so no way can she go missing.. she's not e irresponsible type..
den again.. she's rather upset tat nobody keeps her inform abt the chu shi tmr.. initially was said to help in dragon pfm.. den heard dun nid le.. but stil gotta help out in welcoming.. she changed her schedule becux of this.. n kinda irritated her supervisor cux of the troubles.. now she got this.. wth..
she had been hunting for cameras for years.. finali she saw the one she like pretty much.. but its kinda expensive.. going to cost her a bomb.. panasonic fx9.. 6megapix, 1gb memory.. for $649.. pretty good.. but she dun earn as much.. she cant probably get someone to buy her tat as a bdae present either.. its way too ex.. unless its at least 60ppl sharing.. haas.. not too possible..
she's acting weird recently.. at least tats wad her son told her.. wheneva he mention abt dragon.. she would be so pissed off.. n starts to gif attitude.. dunno wads going on wif her.. sick n tired? probably ba.. not as enthu as she used to be le.. haiz..
27days to her last yr of teens..
den again.. she's rather upset tat nobody keeps her inform abt the chu shi tmr.. initially was said to help in dragon pfm.. den heard dun nid le.. but stil gotta help out in welcoming.. she changed her schedule becux of this.. n kinda irritated her supervisor cux of the troubles.. now she got this.. wth..
she had been hunting for cameras for years.. finali she saw the one she like pretty much.. but its kinda expensive.. going to cost her a bomb.. panasonic fx9.. 6megapix, 1gb memory.. for $649.. pretty good.. but she dun earn as much.. she cant probably get someone to buy her tat as a bdae present either.. its way too ex.. unless its at least 60ppl sharing.. haas.. not too possible..
she's acting weird recently.. at least tats wad her son told her.. wheneva he mention abt dragon.. she would be so pissed off.. n starts to gif attitude.. dunno wads going on wif her.. sick n tired? probably ba.. not as enthu as she used to be le.. haiz..
27days to her last yr of teens..
Friday, April 14, 2006
wan to cry liao la.. jux received moi latest work schedule.. so many weekends not scheduled to work.. wad am i going to do at home?!! today holiday neber work already half dead liao.. wanted to go shopping.. nobody to col along.. leg pain.. oso dunno how to go jalan.. slept at 5am.. woke up at 230pm.. wth.. tot of going moiself.. den raining.. y is the heaven going against mi too?!! bdae holiday.. holiday double pay.. not working too.. no progammes.. no party.. haix..
im so bored.. den moi khakis all not online.. guess everybody got their own programmes ba.. sianx.. wad a good friday..
im so bored.. den moi khakis all not online.. guess everybody got their own programmes ba.. sianx.. wad a good friday..
the same route. the same surroundings. the same people.
different status. different feelings.
as time flies. things do change. environment change. people change.
no longer the same.
things tat needs to be said. couldnt be said.
things tat shdnt happen. happened.
granny. no longer herself.
soul gone. laughter gone. enthusiasm gone.
missing. one day. some day.
went huang shifu's mum wake today. simple but good service. noe almost all who attended. sp, nyp, rp, wc, wj. big family. one for all, all for one. owaes helping each other. wonders how long will she be with them. she has a home she couldnt return. yet she has a family she couldnt col it her own. everybody treated her like princess. respected her though loved to tease her. dey will be dere for her whenever she's feeling down. she loves them. she reali do. but she's breaking down. mentally.
dere r some things she jux couldnt sae it out. she's feeling terrible hiding it in her heart. its not like her. she's no longer the noisy little granny. things tat seem simple r getting complicated. y is she implicated? she reali need someone beside her. jux stand by her side. she dun get it. whenever her friends need companion. she will try her best to be dere for them. but when she needs someone... ... there's no one in sight. is it becux she has got too many friends tat she dunno who to turn to? too many things happened tat taught her not to trust a person too easily?
u can haf as many friends as u want. but one who can keep u accompany when u r down is enuff.
different status. different feelings.
as time flies. things do change. environment change. people change.
no longer the same.
things tat needs to be said. couldnt be said.
things tat shdnt happen. happened.
granny. no longer herself.
soul gone. laughter gone. enthusiasm gone.
missing. one day. some day.
went huang shifu's mum wake today. simple but good service. noe almost all who attended. sp, nyp, rp, wc, wj. big family. one for all, all for one. owaes helping each other. wonders how long will she be with them. she has a home she couldnt return. yet she has a family she couldnt col it her own. everybody treated her like princess. respected her though loved to tease her. dey will be dere for her whenever she's feeling down. she loves them. she reali do. but she's breaking down. mentally.
dere r some things she jux couldnt sae it out. she's feeling terrible hiding it in her heart. its not like her. she's no longer the noisy little granny. things tat seem simple r getting complicated. y is she implicated? she reali need someone beside her. jux stand by her side. she dun get it. whenever her friends need companion. she will try her best to be dere for them. but when she needs someone... ... there's no one in sight. is it becux she has got too many friends tat she dunno who to turn to? too many things happened tat taught her not to trust a person too easily?
u can haf as many friends as u want. but one who can keep u accompany when u r down is enuff.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
he called.. but she din pick up the fone.. in fact she was jux beside.. she jux dun feel like.. she's confused.. again.. everytime he comes back, she will be in a lost.. one part of her wanted so much to continue their story.. yet e other part told her to let go.. she dunno wad to do..
he said now she's e one giving him empty hope.. did dey patch in the firx place?? haiz.. wad should she do?? where's her guardian angle?? would somebody guide her??
he said now she's e one giving him empty hope.. did dey patch in the firx place?? haiz.. wad should she do?? where's her guardian angle?? would somebody guide her??
she woke up late.. den to realise her leg is hurting again.. it reali hurts.. she cant even twist her ankle properly.. wont be surprised if she cant walk..
dey were supposed to haf lunch together today.. she asked.. and he said 'anything'.. seems like he dun gif it a damn.. whether dey meet anot doesnt mean anything.. its the 'ting jiu hao' again? probably ba.. dey owaes agreed to sumtink but neber once accomplish it.. haiz..
its the 12th today.. one more month its granny's bdae.. tears not going to flow anymore.. gotta stop.. i've got better things to do den to let moi heart ache everynite..
let mi go disney.. let mi go pls.. let mi go away for a while.. im reali hurt.. reali hurt this time.. pls..
dey were supposed to haf lunch together today.. she asked.. and he said 'anything'.. seems like he dun gif it a damn.. whether dey meet anot doesnt mean anything.. its the 'ting jiu hao' again? probably ba.. dey owaes agreed to sumtink but neber once accomplish it.. haiz..
its the 12th today.. one more month its granny's bdae.. tears not going to flow anymore.. gotta stop.. i've got better things to do den to let moi heart ache everynite..
let mi go disney.. let mi go pls.. let mi go away for a while.. im reali hurt.. reali hurt this time.. pls..
somehow her entries seem to bring so much hurt to ppl ard her.. jm read her blog.. was a big blow to her.. she tot he lied to her again.. when the truth is.. nobody noes dey had neber stop contacting each other.. in fact.. nobody asked abt em.. dey did remain as friends.. purely friends.. sometimes.. things dun nid too much explanation.. the more u tries to explain.. the more complicating it becomes..
e fact is dey r jux friends.. she's jux somebody he can turn to when he needs a shoulder to cry on.. he cols her bb.. wad he used to col her.. she dun feel anythink anymore.. no longer like e other time when she cried as he called her by tat name.. nomore..
dey r meeting up for lunch.. their usual place usual stall usual lunch.. she's kinda nervous.. wondering wad wud happen when dey meet.. dey haven met for months, alone.. almost a yr.. its going to feel kinda awkward.. wont it? actuali.. she's not in the mood rite now..
went training today.. basic training.. her leg hurts again.. the infected area.. she din change clothes.. but stil gotta teach.. n its somebody whom she dun like.. she heard the gal kinda backstab her.. her home ppl din noe abt her r/s wid wj.. she noes dere will be misunderstanding.. tats y she neber breathe a word.. yet tat asshole let it all out to their shifu when she dunno anything.. wth!!
she reali regretted asking her to join sp.. she's so fake.. not like who she used to noe.. so lazy.. so materalistic.. so girlie.. training stil put makeup.. wad the hell!! she almost raised her voice at her.. jux cant stand the way she's behaving.. yucks! sucks to the core!!
n why of all ppl.. put them in the same team!! she wanted so much to distance away from her.. she was advised to keep a distance.. get away from mi!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
her kids tot she was so excited she finali found somebody to sub her lollipop.. e truth is.. she dun.. but she had to get a substitute.. her leg is giving her problems.. n her waist.. n her wrist.. she's injured everywhere.. she gotta take care.. she couldnt reali do stuns anymore.. n today.. her heart problem came back.. once in a while.. she will start panting with no reason.. she dunno why.. but guess sumtink's not rite.. haix..
can somebody lend her a hug.. she's crying..
she's loud n noisy.. all she wanted was attention
she needs to noe she's not alone
she hates to be neglected.. she hated e feeling of loneliness
she's owaes laughing.. yet deep within she's feeling empty
all she needed was care n concern
all along she had em all..
until somebody appear.. e somebody who backstab her
she had to share
reluctant.. she puts in her usual smile n cries in her heart
everybody treated e asshole like treasure
who would ever understand how she feels?
e fact is dey r jux friends.. she's jux somebody he can turn to when he needs a shoulder to cry on.. he cols her bb.. wad he used to col her.. she dun feel anythink anymore.. no longer like e other time when she cried as he called her by tat name.. nomore..
dey r meeting up for lunch.. their usual place usual stall usual lunch.. she's kinda nervous.. wondering wad wud happen when dey meet.. dey haven met for months, alone.. almost a yr.. its going to feel kinda awkward.. wont it? actuali.. she's not in the mood rite now..
went training today.. basic training.. her leg hurts again.. the infected area.. she din change clothes.. but stil gotta teach.. n its somebody whom she dun like.. she heard the gal kinda backstab her.. her home ppl din noe abt her r/s wid wj.. she noes dere will be misunderstanding.. tats y she neber breathe a word.. yet tat asshole let it all out to their shifu when she dunno anything.. wth!!
she reali regretted asking her to join sp.. she's so fake.. not like who she used to noe.. so lazy.. so materalistic.. so girlie.. training stil put makeup.. wad the hell!! she almost raised her voice at her.. jux cant stand the way she's behaving.. yucks! sucks to the core!!
n why of all ppl.. put them in the same team!! she wanted so much to distance away from her.. she was advised to keep a distance.. get away from mi!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
her kids tot she was so excited she finali found somebody to sub her lollipop.. e truth is.. she dun.. but she had to get a substitute.. her leg is giving her problems.. n her waist.. n her wrist.. she's injured everywhere.. she gotta take care.. she couldnt reali do stuns anymore.. n today.. her heart problem came back.. once in a while.. she will start panting with no reason.. she dunno why.. but guess sumtink's not rite.. haix..
can somebody lend her a hug.. she's crying..
she's loud n noisy.. all she wanted was attention
she needs to noe she's not alone
she hates to be neglected.. she hated e feeling of loneliness
she's owaes laughing.. yet deep within she's feeling empty
all she needed was care n concern
all along she had em all..
until somebody appear.. e somebody who backstab her
she had to share
reluctant.. she puts in her usual smile n cries in her heart
everybody treated e asshole like treasure
who would ever understand how she feels?
Monday, April 10, 2006
ck called while she was asleep in the train.. n he said u look ugly when u slp in the train.. oh gosh! dey chatted for a while den he finali admitted he was not in the train at all.. lolx!! well.. even if he was.. she wouldnt noe.. she dun remember how he looks like.. could even sae she neber reali met him.. but somehow.. deres a connection btw em..
dey knew each other for almost a yr.. but dey neber met.. he noes how she looks like.. onli she dunno.. but dey kept in contact thru fone.. n dey cud tok everything under e sun like nobody biz.. deres owaes laughter in their conversation..
he reminded her when he ask how's she doing.. she was once hurt so deeply.. he reminded him how he treated her in the past.. is she going back to him?? this time.. she haf to make her decision wisely.. or probably not necessary.. its complicating.. she dun even noe where she stands now..
she onli noes somewhere in her heart he stil exists.. n somehow.. she's not getting a bf..
if anybody ever wonders.. this would be her answer " cux im called gunainai".. granny is contented enuff to haf her grandchildren wif her.. she dun ask for more..
dey knew each other for almost a yr.. but dey neber met.. he noes how she looks like.. onli she dunno.. but dey kept in contact thru fone.. n dey cud tok everything under e sun like nobody biz.. deres owaes laughter in their conversation..
he reminded her when he ask how's she doing.. she was once hurt so deeply.. he reminded him how he treated her in the past.. is she going back to him?? this time.. she haf to make her decision wisely.. or probably not necessary.. its complicating.. she dun even noe where she stands now..
she onli noes somewhere in her heart he stil exists.. n somehow.. she's not getting a bf..
if anybody ever wonders.. this would be her answer " cux im called gunainai".. granny is contented enuff to haf her grandchildren wif her.. she dun ask for more..
Sunday, April 09, 2006
tot of putting up e lyrics norman sent mi.. was so meaningful.. describes exactly how i feel.. but it crashes moi blog.. damn! wait till i learnt how to post chinese words ba..
somehow dunno wad happen.. dey agreed on being the part time post onli the two of em wil noe.. she allowed him to apply cux he had e experience.. or was it becux of special privileges she had stored for him? she stated her terms.. if he is able to oblige he will be paid handsomely..
but is this thing for real? r things meant to turn out this way?? were dey meant to be??
dey dreamt e same thing on the same day.. his ended sweetly.. but hers ended wid disappointment.. wad does tat mean??
dey met 2003.. got together in the same yr.. feelings onli grow stronger after a few months.. couples envied their sweetness.. until dey started to quarrel.. n finali ended in 2005..
dey kept in contact as friends.. he kept her informed of his lifestories.. his lovestories.. she was dere when he was down.. had owaes been the pillar for him to hold on.. neber once had she left.. even when she feels tat he had found his true love..
when she finali stabilized.. softly in her heart whispered.. she will neber go back to him again.. he comes back.. n somehow she allows him to..
the chapter unfolds on their 2 n 1/2yr anniversary.. or did it?
she read her blog.. e other her who loves him so much yet at the same time hurt him so much.. tat her needs him more.. she's alrdy kinda used to her single life.. he can do so much for tat her.. he does love her.. doesnt he? she noes love is selfish.. but she rather be the one behind the scene.. bless him..
-to gs-
dunno if u will get to read this.. jux wanna sae sorrie for hurting u so much.. shdnt haf misled u..
i noe sorrie no cure.. but tats e onli word i cud think of..
go ahead n avoid mi ba.. if this will make u feel much better.. though disappointed cux im going to lose a good buddy.. but rather u live happier.. all the best for ur future endeavours..
somehow dunno wad happen.. dey agreed on being the part time post onli the two of em wil noe.. she allowed him to apply cux he had e experience.. or was it becux of special privileges she had stored for him? she stated her terms.. if he is able to oblige he will be paid handsomely..
but is this thing for real? r things meant to turn out this way?? were dey meant to be??
dey dreamt e same thing on the same day.. his ended sweetly.. but hers ended wid disappointment.. wad does tat mean??
dey met 2003.. got together in the same yr.. feelings onli grow stronger after a few months.. couples envied their sweetness.. until dey started to quarrel.. n finali ended in 2005..
dey kept in contact as friends.. he kept her informed of his lifestories.. his lovestories.. she was dere when he was down.. had owaes been the pillar for him to hold on.. neber once had she left.. even when she feels tat he had found his true love..
when she finali stabilized.. softly in her heart whispered.. she will neber go back to him again.. he comes back.. n somehow she allows him to..
the chapter unfolds on their 2 n 1/2yr anniversary.. or did it?
she read her blog.. e other her who loves him so much yet at the same time hurt him so much.. tat her needs him more.. she's alrdy kinda used to her single life.. he can do so much for tat her.. he does love her.. doesnt he? she noes love is selfish.. but she rather be the one behind the scene.. bless him..
-to gs-
dunno if u will get to read this.. jux wanna sae sorrie for hurting u so much.. shdnt haf misled u..
i noe sorrie no cure.. but tats e onli word i cud think of..
go ahead n avoid mi ba.. if this will make u feel much better.. though disappointed cux im going to lose a good buddy.. but rather u live happier.. all the best for ur future endeavours..
Saturday, April 08, 2006
he msg n said he was sick n he needed her badly.. somehow a voice tels her tat she needs to col him.. nutink.. jux to be assured he's fine.. he was ill.. seriously ill.. much more serious den e other time.. tis time he had to take care of his own.. without her ard to help out.. dey chatted.. like old frens.. until he said he had all along treated her as his baobei laopo.. she stil plays an impt part in his life.. n neber been replaced.. can he be trusted?
she read jm's blog e other dae.. she said tat he onli wanted her(jm) to be his onli baobei.. she read so many of her entries to find similarity in wad he used to sae to her.. e trust has faded..
he probably plays an impt part in her life too.. she noes clearly he wil neber be replaced.. but she oso noes.. sumtink is missing.. she might yearn for the feeling.. but its neber gonna be e same again..
she dreamt of him.. dey met up as agreed.. for a date.. she wanted so much to hold his hand again.. but neber had e chance.. when she finali hold him.. he was holding a cigarette.. he noes she dun like ppl ard her to smoke.. she let go immediately.. wid disappointment.. attitude changed.. dey went home.. to her home.. slept in the same room.. different beds.. somehow dey hugged.. n almost kissed when he pushed her away.. saying he dun wan to mislead her..
wad is the dream trying to tel her?
frens tel her to put down n carry on wid life.. get a new bf n start anew.. she jux cudnt.. she can accept the fact.. she face reality.. but she jux cudnt let her hand slip into somebody else's.. she once said b4.. he wil be her one n onli hubby.. her last bf.. n she wil wait.. no matter how long.. den she set herself a deadline.. 090909.. e date dey set for rom..
3yrs from now.. wad wil happen? onli heaven noes..
she read jm's blog e other dae.. she said tat he onli wanted her(jm) to be his onli baobei.. she read so many of her entries to find similarity in wad he used to sae to her.. e trust has faded..
he probably plays an impt part in her life too.. she noes clearly he wil neber be replaced.. but she oso noes.. sumtink is missing.. she might yearn for the feeling.. but its neber gonna be e same again..
she dreamt of him.. dey met up as agreed.. for a date.. she wanted so much to hold his hand again.. but neber had e chance.. when she finali hold him.. he was holding a cigarette.. he noes she dun like ppl ard her to smoke.. she let go immediately.. wid disappointment.. attitude changed.. dey went home.. to her home.. slept in the same room.. different beds.. somehow dey hugged.. n almost kissed when he pushed her away.. saying he dun wan to mislead her..
wad is the dream trying to tel her?
frens tel her to put down n carry on wid life.. get a new bf n start anew.. she jux cudnt.. she can accept the fact.. she face reality.. but she jux cudnt let her hand slip into somebody else's.. she once said b4.. he wil be her one n onli hubby.. her last bf.. n she wil wait.. no matter how long.. den she set herself a deadline.. 090909.. e date dey set for rom..
3yrs from now.. wad wil happen? onli heaven noes..
Thursday, April 06, 2006
damn!! sumtink's wrong wid moi blog.. but i dunno wad happen.. for once i refresh.. everything is in place.. i refresh again.. everything is messed up.. -_-!!
monday went sinseh wid mum.. serious.. i din sprain moi ankle.. it got infected.. tats y it hurts.. n it hurts alot.. n moi wrist.. e sinseh asked mi to be careful.. said tat e bone shifted.. wth.. everywhere oso injury.. e other time was moi waist.. where will it be e next time??
ytd heard moi dear son pathetic story.. sympathize.. lost of words.. haix.. jux hope everything will turn out well for him.. like i sae.. dun gif up urslf.. dere r stil many out dere who cares for u.. bless him.. -_-
monday went sinseh wid mum.. serious.. i din sprain moi ankle.. it got infected.. tats y it hurts.. n it hurts alot.. n moi wrist.. e sinseh asked mi to be careful.. said tat e bone shifted.. wth.. everywhere oso injury.. e other time was moi waist.. where will it be e next time??
ytd heard moi dear son pathetic story.. sympathize.. lost of words.. haix.. jux hope everything will turn out well for him.. like i sae.. dun gif up urslf.. dere r stil many out dere who cares for u.. bless him.. -_-
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
had a heart to heart talk wid wb last nite.. 5hours.. phew.. tat was long.. so glad we met n knew.. one of moi confidante..
jux now gs msg mi.. said sumtink tat reali pissed mi off.. din asked him to wait in the firx place.. did mention b4 abt 090909.. wadeva.. i dun care anymore.. but moi heart did hurt.. was shattered.. disappointed..
went to his blog.. saw his photos.. dunno y.. felt like a stranger.. somebody i used to depend on.. no longer dere..
spld having problems.. heard displeasure.. cux sp n wj too close.. dunno wad to sae.. ts msg mi.. asked i neber go back wlcs le meh.. dunno wad to sae.. not i dun wan go back.. but i felt extra wheneva i go back.. i dun feel moi importance dere.. i dun haf a role to play..
den again.. i dun belong to wj.. no matter how close am i wid em.. tats not moi home.. not where i belong..
2yrs back.. becux of him.. i left moi home..
den becux of him.. i lost moi soul..
now.. again.. becux of him.. i lost moi directions..
jux now gs msg mi.. said sumtink tat reali pissed mi off.. din asked him to wait in the firx place.. did mention b4 abt 090909.. wadeva.. i dun care anymore.. but moi heart did hurt.. was shattered.. disappointed..
went to his blog.. saw his photos.. dunno y.. felt like a stranger.. somebody i used to depend on.. no longer dere..
spld having problems.. heard displeasure.. cux sp n wj too close.. dunno wad to sae.. ts msg mi.. asked i neber go back wlcs le meh.. dunno wad to sae.. not i dun wan go back.. but i felt extra wheneva i go back.. i dun feel moi importance dere.. i dun haf a role to play..
den again.. i dun belong to wj.. no matter how close am i wid em.. tats not moi home.. not where i belong..
2yrs back.. becux of him.. i left moi home..
den becux of him.. i lost moi soul..
now.. again.. becux of him.. i lost moi directions..
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